MANIFESTO # 3 – 2017

MANIFESTO # 3 – 2017

LOW # 4

Just as in times past, I find myself in a low low low. I mean, low. Inexplicable LOW. Yes, it’s beyond depression.

It’s the FULL COMPREHENSION of life. The entire thing: in fact, it’s LIGHT. “The light”.

It’s the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.

What am I saying?

I like walking amidst ruins. I mean, Venice. I mean, Jerusalem or Petra. I love dusty old Arab or semi-Arab lands or partially destroyed scenarios. Always liked paintings like (as, for instance) Max Ernst’s “Europe After the Rain” and dilapidated, rusty, dying, skeletons of ships, buildings, cadavers of cities. Anything and everything that would give me an indication that “we’ve been here before”.

BUT NOT FOR LONG !!!

NOT FOR LONG.

We’re expandable, elastic, far too adaptable: perishable, and that’s terrible. “What else is new?” you might say. True. What else is new. But, sometimes, when you’re both Hamm and Nagg, this realization happens to defy the very purpose of living. Yes, not great philosophy, I know. More like Woody Allen’s dilemma, I know.

But I like being exposed to ruins. The Old Greek Theater in Taormina where we performed M.O.R.T.E. (very appropriate) in 1990. And where my then wife – Silvia Pasello – had a miscarriage.

I love this modern age I live in because…..because? Well because ‘things’ are so badly built that they show signs of the fragility of extinction from the outset and their ephemeral state exist as a precondition that “life ain’t going be around much longer”.

Things aren’t going be around much longer.

This is the philosophy of the COLD WAR.

My era: the COLD WAR.

I was fortunate enough not to have witnessed a WORLD WAR.

But I grew up hearing HORROR stories about the HOLOCAUST since I lost a great part of my family in concentration camps. “They’ll come for you tomorrow. They’ll come through the garden, point the finger UP your nose and will turn AGAINST YOU

I heard that all my life. For the remainder of my life what I’ve witnessed is all COLD WAR stuff and stupid competitiveness from either the right or the left about WHO DETAINS THE TRUTH.

I’m so goddamn tired of all this !

IN the NAME OF GOD.

OMG!!!!

So many atrocities!

I sit here on this July 21st, 2017 more fearful than ever, more depressed than ever, knowing that I have achieved a “place” in history. What place? Don’t know. It may be small. It may be low.

I’m sure it will never compare to, say, a rock band. My work will never reach the outer bounds of, say, my mentor Samuel Beckett or James  Joyce. I know that. But then, what do I know?

And yet, just as in times past, I find myself in a low low low. I mean, low. Inexplicable LOW. Yes, it’s beyond depression.

It’s the FULL COMPREHENSION of life. The entire thing: in fact, it’s LIGHT. “The light”.

It’s time to GO. Clearly, it’s time to GO ! The daily chores are simply TOO MUCH to take. The daily routine is a horrible thing. A simple headache becomes unbearable. One observes one’s skin age and droop. One ‘anima’ lose to the impact of the world. And the ‘daily news’ ? they become a daily BLOW to what’s left of one’s reasoning.

Yes, one’s reasoning. The little that’s left.

 

Gerald Thomas

 

 

 

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